Back when I began the #MagickMondays series last year, I intended to create a regular schedule for posting on a monthly theme with the hopes that it would eventually grow into a blog ring with many chaos magicians and pagans participating. While this hope never manifested, I have truly enjoyed crafting these posts, and intend to continue to write them. But with that being said, its very apparent that in the past few months these posts have been decreasing.
That decrease has been paralell to some personal soul searching. In May of 2014 when I made the jump to my own website I was really excited, but quickly lost direction when I realized I had no real idea what I wanted to do. This has spread into my religious practice as well; I no longer really identify as a chaote or know if I really would want to be associated with those who do. In the 10 years I have been involved with the chaos magick scene it has changed from an experimental, no-holds-barred type of thing into an entirely different majority that has well-deserved the distaste that it has been treated with.
I feel the move away from forums, blogs, and websites to facebook groups has led to the constantly increasing numbers of trolls, one-uppers, and know-it-alls. It disappoints me greatly that so many of the posts on chaos magick these days are regurgitated, reblogged articles on general magick, sex-obsessed workings, and a constant slew of half-assed sigils. Is this all that chaos magick has been reduced to? What happened to the innovative, ground-breaking work that used to be easily found?
On a personal level I have found that sigils are ineffective. They rarely work unless they are connected to a godform or egregore, so I really only use them when working with the DKMU godforms. I have always enjoyed the ability to experiment with different paths and take what is useful, but at this point in life it seems that all paths lead to the same thing. Perhaps it is time for a return to agnostism, and in-depth research.
I guess that the real question I face is the same one we all are facing: What next?